Detective Hale At Your Service
by Dorchester
Summary: Four criminal cases solved by the outstanding person and private investigator, Jasper Hale, described by the Detective's devoted, um, 'admirer' Edward Cullen. Mature content.
1. Chapter 1

Hello, my dear friends! So lovely to be with you again!

My love goes to my fantastic prereader LoopyLou and my fabulous beta Nancy Harrytwifan.

All characters owned by Stephanie Meyer.

**1\. Detective Hale and the Missing Apples**

Saturday morning was shitty. I woke up with a headache, my eyes stung, and I wished all the bartenders on the planet went to hell and burned in flames for eternity. Especially that one who poured my seventh whisky last night.

To make it even worse, Dad called and invited me for a visit.

"We have a minor problem, your Mom and I," he said. "Someone is stealing her socks and underwear."

Fantastic.

~"~

I arrived at my parents' lovely new house in time for lunch. Mom was cooking _Italiano_, which might have been nice if I wasn't feeling like throwing up with every move. So I watched them eat while I took small sips of my soda, expecting Dad to spill the details about their 'minor' problem. Because they didn't like speaking while they ate, you know - I had to be patient.

Finally, Dad picked the last chunk of lasagna from his plate and flashed a contented smile my way.

"You missed a wonderful meal, Edward. Just so you know."

"Leave it, Dad. Tell me why you needed me to come."

"Right, but this is a bit complicated." He stood up and approached Mom's seat, taking her hand and kissing the tips of her fingers. "Your Mom is a little embarrassed by the situation."

She definitely was, because I saw her bite the inside of her cheek, and that was what she did when she felt awkward.

"We're talking about two pairs of stockings, three pairs of panties, and a bra. Oh, and her yoga pants, and maybe some tee shirts, too," Dad went on. "That's all. They went missing from the laundry room during the last few days. We don't know the exact time."

"Were they washed?" I really had to ask. "And you're sure they're not in the house anymore?"

He only answered the second part.

"Of course. We looked everywhere. Everywhere. Your Mom's clothes are simply disappearing."

"And nobody has come and left meanwhile?"

"No one. Absolutely."

"But this is strange."

"Son, you're a genius."

Dad was obviously annoyed. I chose to ignore the sarcasm.

"You're not calling the police, are you?" I just had to ask that, too.

"Of course not, don't be ridiculous. Nothing valuable is missing. They wouldn't bother to investigate properly. But we're sick of it."

I thought so.

Dad dropped Mom's hand and took a few steps toward the serving table. The sight of the fruit basket there made my insides turn. I didn't like fruit very much, and especially that day, I truly hated the sight of the shiny red apple, the bunch of bananas, and the two yellow, ripe pears.

He took the apple and bit it, but something bothered him. He narrowed his eyes and scratched his head with his free hand.

"Esme, I think there were two apples here last night. Did you eat one by any chance?" Dad glanced at Mom with a pleading look in his eyes, as if her admission of eating the apple would save the day.

"You know I wouldn't, Carlisle, dear," Mom answered, as I expected. She hated fruit just like me. Wait, I mean the opposite, I was like her.

"Okay, we have a missing apple too now," Dad stated. There was a hint of panic in his voice.

"Wait a minute, Dad. Are you going to ask me to help guard your laundry and food now?"

"Well… not exactly. I think we should stay awake tonight and guard the doors to the house."

Right. Someone must have been sneaking in while they slept.

"But aren't you locking the doors? And I thought you had a security system?"

"We do."

"How the hell, then, do you think someone is entering?"

"I really don't know, son. Maybe they're disabling the alarm and unlocking the door with a credit card, like in the movies."

"Dad, this is ridiculous. I think we should call for help." And I really needed to catch up with some sleep after last night.

"Any ideas?" Dad asked, not bothering to add enthusiasm to his voice.

"I guess so. We need a detective agency. If you pay, they won't be too picky whether it's valuables or apples missing."

My dad looked at me as if I had just invented the wheel.

"This might be the solution to our problem!"

Mom stood in one abrupt movement and rushed outside of the dining room, only to return a few seconds later with the Yellow Pages in her hand.

"I think we should call someone immediately. This whole thing is creepy, and I'm losing sleep."

"Esme, dear. Put the phonebook away, we don't need it yet." Dad tried to comfort her. "I'll make a few phone calls and try to find a better choice than picking a random name."

A certain 'Hale' agency was recommended to my Dad by an old family friend.

~"~

Detective Jasper Hale stood still outside the opened door. He should have entered thirty seconds ago, but he didn't, the only obstacle in his way being my debilitated self with my feet cemented to the floor.

Because, you see, the man was stunning, with the most beautiful face I had ever seen. I couldn't make myself move, or peel my eyes off him.

After opening the door, I had unexpectedly learned the meaning of "you take my breath away." A stupid old song was playing in my head while I tried to bring my vocal chords to life and invite him in.

I don't know why I expected an older man in a tweed suit. This one wore designer jeans and a white button-down shirt under a suede, dark blue jacket.

My embarrassment doubled when my cock twitched.

Finally, I felt my Dad's palm over my shoulder, which triggered some much desired movement – I stepped aside and let the man in.

"Good evening, Madam, Gentlemen. Detective Jasper Hale at your service."

Well of course, a deep, velvety voice, too_. Fuck me_. A half smile adorned his lips.

He grew serious while he listened to Mom and Dad's story. He asked pretty much the same questions that I'd asked, and this time, my father confirmed that, yes, all the clothes were washed and dried before they disappeared, and yes, the doors had been locked every night. No, he couldn't say if other food was missing, because they had a fully stocked kitchen and didn't keep count of the items.

The detective asked us to show him around the house, and Dad walked away with our visitor. Seconds later, I heard my father's receding voice explain that my parents had owned the place for a mere couple of weeks and were still fascinated by the comfort and design of every single room, even the attic.

The tour took almost an hour. When they came back to me and Mom, Jasper Hale was even more serious and engulfed in his thoughts. We stood silently until he made a few steps toward the exit.

"I need to take a look at the house from the outside, too," he finally stated.

My dad asked me to join the detective for his survey.

The request made my knees tremble. At first, I wanted to believe it was because of the hangover. But a moment later I had to admit to myself I was enthralled by the man in the suede jacket, and the idea of spending the next few minutes with him shook me to the core. Never had I seen a real private investigator, let alone a young, handsome, and mysterious one like Jasper Hale. I gulped and followed him outside. Was I supposed to talk to him? Should I follow, or should I lead him around the house? I was totally dismayed.

He stepped only several yards away from the porch and stopped, his eyes observing the outlines of the house for no longer than a minute. We were standing on the gravel path dividing the house from the main asphalt road.

"Dear Edward, can you help me pick a few dozen of these black pebbles?" Detective Hale's quiet voice startled me. He was already bending his knee and reaching for a dark, hazelnut-sized stone which lay beside the path. I realized there were plenty of these around us and it wouldn't be hard to collect the amount he needed. I had no idea what they were for, but I did what I was asked and started picking up the pebbles. When both my palms were full, I turned to him to ask what to do next. He only took the stones and meticulously planted them in a zigzagging line across the path, adding to the amount he had already placed.

"And some more," he said with a smile. I shrugged and went on with the job, not daring to ask for his purpose.

_'Am I not a shy boy_,' I laughed at myself. Nah, I was only dizzy with a hangover and not in the mood to speak. That's what I told myself, but I knew I was lying.

When he was ready at last, we were standing on both sides of the dark-pebbled zone. I could clearly see three zigzagging lines, but I realized they would appear as a random cluster to someone who didn't know they were deliberately placed. What on Earth… I decided Jasper was either a wacko or an eccentric genius, who didn't find it necessary to explain his deeds. Whichever it was, I liked him very, very much.

Imagine my disappointment when he turned his back to me and walked away.

"Please say goodbye to your parents, Edward. I'll be back early in the morning." He approached the asphalt without saying another word.

After my simple "OK," he got into his car and took off.

~"~

Of course, I decided to stay for the night. The thought that I would see him in the morning was enough reason for me, and to Mom and Dad, I said I needed a good rest. I locked myself in the guest room, jerked off to the daydream of a naked Jasper Hale, and fell asleep.

The next morning greeted me with a bright sun in the window, and my Mom's shriek.

"Carlisle! Come down right now, dear!"

I heard my Dad's footsteps descending to the first floor, and a bit later, their hushed voices. I couldn't overhear the reason for Mom's panic. Curious enough, I hurried downstairs too, only to see Detective Hale's car pulling up at exactly the same place as the day before. I watched him slowly advance towards the house. I wondered if he would avoid stepping on the line of dark pebbles, and was oddly disappointed when he unceremoniously put his foot right in the middle of our creation.

"Good morning, Madam, Gentlemen," the velvety voice greeted us once we let Jasper in. "How are you today?"

"We have another missing apple this morning!" It was my Mom who answered first. That was why she was panicking earlier, I concluded. They had obviously added two apples to the basket last night, and I noticed there was only one in it now. Oh my.

"This would be expected," the detective spoke. "I think someone here is especially fond of red apples. And now, we need to go upstairs to your attic, my friends."

We followed him in bewilderment.

"Mr. Cullen, please open that wardrobe," the detective spoke after we were all gathered in the attic. He pointed at an oak antique cabinet standing near the northern wall.

My dad did what he was asked. The wardrobe was empty.

"Now please, push the back wall, Mr. Cullen."

My dad did so.

The wall fell, and a huge empty space behind it emerged before our eyes.

"Step in, Mr. Cullen," the detective commanded, and Dad's figure disappeared.

Then we heard a girl crying.

"Come on, Miss Swan, follow Mr. Cullen's lead and let us see your face."

It took a couple of minutes for my Dad's figure to reappear. He stepped outside the wardrobe, and after him, another figure emerged from the outlines of the wooden furniture.

The girl was tiny, and very young, maybe a high-school junior. Her long hair partially hid her face, but the traces of tears in her eyes were clearly visible. Somehow, she reminded me of a frightened, strayed lamb.

"Just don't take me back to my parents. Please, please!" she whispered, and started crying again. Her whole body shook with her sobs.

~"~

The next minutes were a whirlwind. The girl made a scene when Dad called the police. When they came for her, we found out she was reported missing three weeks ago. She had escaped her divorcing parents, and was obviously hiding in my parent's house for the last few days. And her parents were the former owners of Mom and Dad's new place.

"I want my old room back, and I want my parents together, and don't want to go anywhere with you," she kept repeating through her whining. The police took her away despite her desperate pleas. The four of us watched her struggle for her freedom while the officers had to force her into the squad car.

~"~

It was time for Detective Hale to speak. And so he did, when we turned our faces toward him with our unspoken questions. _What the hell happened? How did he know?_

"From the very beginning, I knew no one was going in and out of your home unnoticed. Not with the security system you have installed. So it had to be someone from the inside, someone who stayed here and needed fresh food and occasionally some clean clothing. I had to find out where they were hiding, and after walking around, I knew the attic looked narrower from the inside than from the outside. Of course, I could bring you all upstairs and show you the place where the girl was, but I first needed to know if one of you was helping her. In case she had an ally, someone would warn her and she would escape during the night. That would have stopped the disappearance of your belongings, and everything would peacefully end. Besides that, the member of the family who had a secret would not be denounced.

I had a lot of time to think during the night. The person who needed your clothing, Mrs. Cullen, would be a female, and well familiar with the house. My first thought was to check if I could find anything about the former owners of the house. And, bingo, they had a disturbed teenage daughter, Bella, who had made several attempts at running away from her parents, and was recently reported missing again.

This morning, I saw that the pebbles placed yesterday were untouched. So, I was willing to believe the person, Bella or not, was still inside, and I led you all to her.

She will escape from her home again, of that I'm certain, but she will never come back here, and will never again steal your underwear and apples.

Now, Mr. Cullen, I would ask you to send the sum we discussed as my fee to my office today. Or, Mr. Edward can bring it there."

With that, Detective Hale turned his back and reached for the door handle. Right before he stepped out, he turned my way and winked.

"In fact, Mr. Cullen, I'd rather prefer Edward bring the check, if that's okay."

"That's okay," I answered instead of my father, leaving him speechless.

**A/N:** Thanks for reading! Now it's time to ask a question if you have one *winks*

Next: Detective Hale and the Murder in the Tulip Garden


	2. Chapter 2

Lou and Nancy, thank you. Thank you.

To all my reviewers and followers, thank you too. You know why.

So, here's the second installment. No graphic scenes of violence despite the title :) Ah, and I don't own Twilight.

**Detective Hale and the Murder In the Tulip Garden**

The bright afternoon sun peeked through the huge windows of the entrance hall of the Hale Agency. To my left stood a clerk's desk, which was empty. Right in front of me, the sign on a wooden door stated:

'Jasper Hale

Detective'

I checked the money in my pocket for the sixth time. Everything was alright. I sighed and convinced myself to approach that door. But then, my sight was drawn to the right and spotted another door, and another sign:

'Rosalie Hale

Detective'

_Ah, right. A wifey, _my mind registered. _You're all fucked up, Cullen._

There we were, the family business of my fancy jerk-off daydream objectified, and my ruined self, teary-eyed, not daring to make a step further. To add to my turmoil, a blonde beauty queen stepped out of said second door and asked me what I was looking for.

_I'm looking for that gorgeous piece of meat in the suede jacket, sweetie._ Or was I not supposed to even think of him?

"Um, good afternoon, Madam. I'm Edward Cullen, and I'm here to meet Detective Hale. I think he's expecting me."

"Oh, let me check if he's available."

She was not even polite, for God's sake. She disappeared in Jasper's office, only to come out seconds later.

"He's expecting you, indeed. Come on in."

I stepped inside his office. I barely noticed there was plenty of wooden furniture, and the walls were decorated with diplomas, certificates, and black and white photos. Ask me who was on those photos, and my answer would be 'Who the hell knows'. I simply gaped at Jasper Hale, the man who sat behind a large mahogany desk and represented my image of beauty in a black polo-shirt. Yeah, pathetic, I know. Right then, I only focused on the thought that he was taken. My words failed me, so I took the bills out of my pocket and extended them over to him in silence.

He never stretched his hand to take them. Instead, he nodded in a silent greeting and gestured toward a chair, pointing for me to take a seat.

I sat.

His look then hovered over my entire body, I blushed, and almost jumped back to my feet when his wife's voice startled me.

"I'll leave you two alone. Have fun."

The door handle clicked and silence took over the room.

~"~

"Hello," I said. "Nice to meet you again." And that was all I could come up with.

Good thing the phone on the desk rang. I fidgeted in my seat, while he seemed to be entirely engulfed in his thoughts, his middle finger playing a steady rhythm over his cheekbone. After the third ring, he picked up the receiver and stood, turning to face the window and putting his backside on display for me. I silently thanked God I didn't have to communicate at the moment – and was left to explore the curves of the Detective's body in peace.

And what a view that was. The exact amount of muscles in the right places. Broad shoulders, no fat around the waist, deliciously convexed asscheeks. I had to admit to myself that what made him outstanding was his entire posture, because he stood there as if he owned the world.

I didn't pay much attention to his conversation, only a phrase or two managing to seep through my clouded brain.

"… Where did that happen…"

"… And why not?..."

"… Come on, Seth, you're not helping me…"

"… I assume I have to take a look at her place first…"

"… I have to leave now, _Edward_…"

Wait, shit, the last one was directed at me! I stood up.

"Please, take me with you."

What?! Did I say that out loud? I obviously did, because he was staring at me wide-eyed.

"Why should I, Edward?"

Why, indeed. I was a nobody and he was married.

"Because I need to spend more time with you." Damn my mouth in self-forming-sentences mode. I guessed I had ruined every chance to meet him another time, since he turned his back to me again and gave no answer.

"I'm sorry," I muttered "I'll be leaving now. It was nice knowing you."

"Stay." His booming voice startled me. I waited for what was to come next.

I watched him walk around his desk, each step bringing him closer. He finally stopped in front of me, his face inches from mine. Next, he shifted his hand, with his index finger pointing between my eyes.

"I knew something was happening in that head of yours," he said. Then he moved even closer, until his warm breath brushed my lips. It seemed like eternity until he whispered, "I like you. You can come with me."

His face was so close, I was able to _inhale_ those words. They tasted like heaven.

~" ~

"That was my close friend Seth calling. He wants me to prove his sister hasn't committed suicide. I'm taking the case, and I'm starting immediately, although it's probably too late." Jasper spoke while he directed me to his black Audi. The car suited him well with the hint of bestiality in its design. "Let's drive, and I'll tell you the details while we're on the road. So far, nothing confidential, so I'm giving you everything I know."

"Seth's sister, Leah Clearwater, worked as a laboratory technician for the Uley's, the owners of the biggest flower farm in the district. Two weeks ago, her dead body was found in one of the tulip gardens. In her hand was a farewell letter, where she admitted she was desperately in love with her boss, Sam Uley, and she was going to end with her life, because there was no hope for her. A little glass tube was found next to the body, and further tests confirmed she'd swallowed a poisonous substance. Considering the fact that she had access to various types of chemicals, the police concluded she prepared her own poison and committed suicide.

"My friend Seth just obtained her farewell letter, which was kept until today as evidence. He's certain it's not written by his sister. He told me he knew his sister wouldn't mean a word from that thing. The problem is, it's without a doubt her handwriting. I asked him for a more detailed explanation of his reasons, but he refused to talk about the subject, asking me to come see for myself. Now we're driving to Leah's apartment and will meet Seth there. He'll give us the letter, too."

Several minutes later, we were advancing to Leah's apartment. Being in an elevator with Jasper Hale played some kind of a trick on my mind, and although we kept a decent distance between ourselves, I imagined wild sex and cheesy cuddling. The whole thing was not helping my concentration, so I didn't even notice which floor we were on and the number on the white door opened before us.

A young Native American greeted us. He invited us inside a small apartment, explaining in two words which room was which. While I wondered if it would take a lot of time to look around the place, Jasper entered the bedroom. I followed him inside and saw him looking at the photos on the walls. Behind me, Seth explained. "That's Leah. And those are Sam and Emily Uley. They were sort of Leah's friends." They all looked charming, smiling for the photographer, carefree.

Jasper opened a drawer beside the bed. He rummaged through the contents for several moments, then closed it and turned abruptly toward Seth.

"I'm finished here. We can go to the gardens now."

"But don't you wanna see the letter first?" Seth asked.

"I don't need it," Jasper answered, and led us outside.

~"~

Out in the parking lot, Jasper told Seth he needed a favor.

"I guess you have picked up her belongings, is that right, Seth? We need access to the laboratory. Call Sam Uley and tell him you forgot something. Something you need to search for."

"But there's nothing I can think of, Jasper." The younger man's face turned pale. "There wasn't too much of her personal stuff there. And I don't think I want to go back."

"No? Then we have to find another way to sneak in. You go wait for us in my office, Seth. I can understand you have good enough reason to hate that place."

We left Seth behind and headed to the Audi. While I closed the door from the inside, I heard Jasper murmuring, sharing my own thoughts. "Why would he call for my help, then refuse to cooperate?" He made himself comfortable in the driver's seat and we took off.

This time, we drove for a little longer. I was nervous, very nervous, and _not_ because we were going to trespass on someone's property. There was something in the air inside the car infatuating and suffocating me in equal measures. I knew I couldn't stand it much longer, when Jasper suddenly pulled onto the shoulder of the road.

"What's wrong, Edward?" I jumped in my seat. "You look like you've smelled a rotten egg. Cold feet?"

"Not at all." I intended to explain I felt awkward being so close to him, but my nervousness took over and I preferred to shut up before I said something stupid.

"Do I make you uncomfortable?" He stared intently into my eyes.

"Um, no," I lied.

"Good." He placed his hand on my knee, then tapped it twice. "Good." Millions of tiny creatures marched over my skin, beginning their crusade from where his hand was just laying.

In the blink of an eye, we were back on the road.

By the time we reached the flower farm, the sun was setting low. Its rays colored the endless beds of flowers in orange and crimson, and the glasses of the greenhouses reflected the light, creating the illusion there were hundreds of suns. The sight was surreal.

"Let's go. We'll try to talk our way in." Jasper made a gesture toward the gateway.

The guard judged we were harmless, because he let us in after a few words from the Detective. The elderly man explained that Mr. and Mrs. Uley were not on the farm right then, but we could take a look around. He felt pity for one of the deceased girl's former lovers, impersonated by Jasper.

"I never thought she might have had a boyfriend," he muttered behind our backs.

"That's one clever man," Jasper said in a hushed voice.

~"~

The building which incorporated Leah's laboratory and the storage for tulip bulbs was the one to the right of the last greenhouse. The tulip garden began right in front of it, and the place where Leah's body had been found was a mere five feet away from the entrance to that building – that's what the guard told us.

Jasper dropped to his knees when we reached the spot, and brushed his dry cheek, pretending wipe away a tear. While he put on a show for the old man, I saw him quickly observing the beds of flowers around us. There were tulips in white and red, all of them looking as if the edges of their petals were dabbed in blood. I shivered. By the time Jasper stood up, the guard had lost interest and had stopped observing our actions. He didn't see Jasper taking out a lockpick from his pocket, or our figures entering the door half a minute later.

Nothing inside looked suspicious. There were plenty of shelves and cupboards overstuffed by flasks and glass tubes. The desk was covered with printed sheets of paper, as well as tons of handwritten notes. Jasper ran his eyes over the sheets, picked two of them, and read them thoroughly. He handed the notes to me and ordered me to hide them in my inside pocket, which I did without hesitation. Then he approached a cupboard with locked glass doors and observed the tulip bulbs laying inside.

"Okay, I guess that's all. Let's get out of here," he said.

All at once, we headed back out to the tulip beds. Outside, he dropped to his knees once again, this time picking two flowers. He unexpectedly outstretched his arm, waiting for me to help him. But I noticed the guard was back watching us, so I realized that was another pose.

"Thank you, sir. I'm so grateful." We were leaving the flower farm, but Jasper had to say some final words to the guard. "But that's how life goes. She left me so long ago, and now I have to let go of my dreams about her for good. Thank you again, sir, and goodbye."

The tone of Jasper's voice brought a tear to the old man's eye. I even heard him sobbing behind our backs when we headed for our car.

"Hold the flowers, Edward. And be careful; one of them is evidence," Jasper ordered once we were seated back in the Audi.

"And the other?" I couldn't help but ask.

"The other one is for you." He turned his face toward me and smiled. My jaw dropped.

_Oh my. Was he trying to tell me…_

"Now, Edward, case solved. We need to ride quickly to my office, before Seth loses his patience."

_No, he wasn't trying to tell me anything._

The ride back was a blur.

~"~

"Edward, Seth, have you heard of the Broken Tulip Virus?"

Both Seth and I shrugged and shook our heads.

We were looking at Jasper, standing beside his mahogany desk and gently touching the petals of the white and red tulip.

"Well, this one is what they call a Broken Tulip. Nature could never design this pattern on a flower's petal. It's artificial and caused by a virus. This is what Leah was working on until the day of her death. Among all the sheets in the laboratory, I found one signed by her, and it described the invention of a new mutation. She was going to grow an unknown type of tulip, Seth. Maybe even more beautiful than this one. But I also found a copy of the same description signed by Emily Uley. She wanted the fame and glory all to herself. That's why Leah Clearwater, the real author of the invention, had to disappear. I can only guess how they forced her to write that letter and drink the poison, but I'm sure they will admit to it in court. I'm am also guessing Sam and his wife were partners in this crime. This tulip and the two notes are our proof that the woman, if not the two of them, is guilty.

"A few minutes ago, I realized why you were torn between sorrow and denial, Seth. I know you loved Leah, but were you ashamed of your sister? You knew what I was going to find in her drawer! You left that strap-on there for me to make my own conclusions, right? Because you couldn't find it in you to tell me. Your sister was a lesbian, Seth. Say it. That is why she couldn't have fallen in love with Sam Uley."

Seth was crying. I took that as a 'yes' to all the questions.

"You should have been proud of her, Seth. Look what a brilliant scientist she was!"

"I know, Jasper, I know. I feel horrible. I had to tell her how much I loved her, and that I was really proud of her. I am proud of you too and so grateful. Thank you, man."

"You're welcome. And learn to accept gay people, hear me?"

"I hear you." Seth stretched his arms to embrace Jasper.

"What, you're not afraid to be hugged by a gay man?" Jasper was smiling now.

"I'm not, Jass." Seth was smiling, too.

_A gay man…_ I took a deep breath. _Wait… but he was married, wasn't he?_


	3. Chapter 3

We're moving on with the detective story!

My love goes to my fantastic prereader LoopyLou and my fabulous beta Nancy Harrytwifan. All characters owned by Stephanie Meyer.

**3\. Detective Hale and the Silk Ribbon**

It was very hard to ask that question.

And the answer was devastating.

"Yes, she is my wife."

I felt the Earth removing itself from under my feet.

Seeking for an anchor, I grabbed the back of the nearest chair. My legs were shaking like Jello. I closed my eyes to block the view of Jasper's half smile, which lit his face while he spoke. Like an idiot, I was oddly glad of the fact Seth Clearwater had left the room a few minutes prior, and wouldn't see this ugly, ruined version of Edward Cullen - one that should be hidden from everyone's eyes.

I must have looked like a pathetic mess. I realized it did no favor to me to show my weakness in front of Jasper, so I braced myself, squared my shoulders, and opened my eyes. He was staring at me, that little smile still on his lips, his head slightly tilted to the left.

"What's upsetting you?" he asked.

There I laughed. That was one bitter laughter.

"What is upsetting me? Maybe it's that I couldn't be more wrong about you? Why did you give me the stupid flower? What did it mean?" I yelled without even realizing, before I heard the echo in the vast room.

What was going on with me? What made me shout at that man? I had no right. I was rushing in the silliest of ways. I pursed my lips and did my best to gather some of my pride back.

"Edward, stop being a drama queen and listen." He spoke quietly.

Drama queen. Right. I lifted my chin and narrowed my eyes.

"But I heard you saying you were gay." _Shut up, Edward, you fool._

He kept silent for several moments. The kind of silence that would take over the world after the end of days. Thank god, his answer came before I believed I was dead.

"I am gay. I like sex with men. But still, I'm married to Rosalie, and that is not going to change."

"Oh…" I had to gulp several times. "Thank you." I lowered my gaze and followed the pattern of the carpet with one of my eyes, the other one blurred by a welling tear.

_What was that song? 'Dazed and Confused', precisely._

Was I supposed to say anything else?

He left no space for wondering. I felt his finger lifting my chin, and then his lips brushing over mine. In an instant, I was melting, but the kiss was too short.

"I gave you the flower because I wanted to observe your reaction," he whispered, "and see if I could have you one day."

"And what did you see?" I blurted.

"I saw that I could have you at any moment. Like, right now."

I couldn't feel my legs. They were no longer shaking; they were absent.

A hand pressed to my stomach, then crept to the side of my hip, stopping at the rim of my pocket. Then it went further, inside the pocket.

"You have something that belongs to me," the voice in my ear kept on whispering.

My eyes rolled back, and I was fighting for every breath. In my mind, I was already having sex with my gorgeous Jasper. I thought I might come right there and then, standing next to that chair in the Hale Agency.

Moments later, I realized the hand was no longer present. The noise of shuffling bills made me focus on the real world.

Jasper was counting the money my Dad gave me.

I ran.

Out in the street, my Volvo was waiting for me. I crawled in the driver's seat, buckled up, and grabbed the wheel. It took me several minutes to will the tears to stop rolling over my cheeks, then I took off for home.

Stupid, stupid Edward. Stupid, stupid cock, still pulsating.

~"~

Several uneventful days followed. Being self-employed, I decided to give myself some rest and simply stay in, with a few good books and a couple of bottles containing quality malt. I knew myself well, and was sure the combination would work.

But it didn't. Of course.

Too often, I found myself staring out the window, dwelling on my silliness.

"Who cares," I spoke to myself. "The world is full of other men, for God's sake."

Strange thing-I wasn't convincing.

_Ha-ha. Funny Edward, trying to forget the detective._

Then one morning, Dad called.

"Guess who invited us to their School Recital?"

"Um, I don't know, Dad. Why don't you tell me?"

"It's Bella Swan. Remember Bella Swan?"

"The girl from the attic?"

"Yep. She called and explained she wanted to make it up for the inconvenience she caused. So she is inviting us to a play being staged by her and her classmates this Saturday. You coming?"

"What play?"

"It's Snow White. What does it matter? The girl is trying to be nice, so are you coming or not? She said you could bring a date, too." There was that hint of annoyance in my dad's voice that I hated. Don't get me wrong, he was not annoyed by the type of date I would bring. He was always annoyed by the delay in my answer.

"Okay, okay," I hurried to confirm. "I'm coming, but no date."

"Great, see you there, son. Remember, Saturday. We have four seats anyway, so you still have a couple of days to think of someone."

Oh, did I think of someone.

~"~

On Friday, I decided to call him.

Yes, I decided. But I didn't call.

I managed on Saturday morning, though.

His voice sounded more velvety, if that was even possible.

"I'm happy to hear from you, Edward."

Was that excitement?

"Um, nice to hear you too, Detective."

"It's Jass."

"Pardon?"

"My friends call me Jass. What did you want to tell me, Edward?"

"Remember Bella Swan? The runaway girl?"

"I do."

"Well, she invited us to a school play today."

"Us?"

"Um, my family. We have a spare ticket though, and I thought of you."

Okay, I knew that sounded stupid. I was sure he would laugh.

"What time today?"

_What?! Fuck me, he's not rejecting the idea?_

"Five in the afternoon." I was not sure how I coped with producing a sound.

"Pick me up at the agency at four-thirty?"

_Fuck me twice, it's happening._

"I will. See you then."

I was dead to the world until the afternoon.

~"~

From what I'd seen in the movies, what I looked like at 4:30 p.m. was a zombie. I felt like one, too.

He was waiting for me on the curb, near the entrance of the building, holding a tulip in his hand. When I stepped out of the car, he approached and handed me the tulip. His face was so sad it hurt.

"What does this mean, Jass?" I had to ask. "Another flower?"

"It means what it means, Edward. I like you, and I apologize."

"For what?"

"For hurting your feelings the other day. I didn't realize I would make you run away from me. I was going to explain."

"But I rushed."

"You did."

He was now smiling. I was relieved. We didn't discuss the matter any more. I carefully placed the flower in the back seat, and we made ourselves comfortable in the car and took off.

~"~

The play was good. They had wonderful costumes, and Bella made a perfect Snow White. The evil stepmother was another tiny creature with spiky hair, and she was very good in her role, too - until it came to the moment when she, disguised as a comb-seller, had to pick a ribbon from her basket and pass it to Snow White. At that moment, the girl left all the audience gaping in dismay. She held a red ribbon in her hand, presented it to Bella's character, then fell to her knees. With her chin lowered to her chest, she remained still for a long minute, then suddenly jumped back to her feet and escaped from the stage.

The play was ruined. The participants wandered before the audience for a bit longer, but the plot had lost its essence. The dialogue was disrupted, and Bella was crying. They finally gave up, and the dwarves carried Snow White away, giving a sign to an invisible person to draw the curtain. Right before the wings were closed, we saw Bella gesturing toward us and pointing somewhere to the backstage.

The hall was empty in several minutes, the last of the other disappointed spectators leaving before my Mom and Dad followed them as well.

"Let's go see what Bella wants," Jasper said, and we headed backstage.

"Do you have any idea of what caused that girl's behavior, Jass?"

"I know her reasons perfectly well."

"You do?"

"Believe me, I do. Maybe you'll see for yourself."

~"~

The girl with the spiky hair sat in an improvised makeup room down a corridor. She kept her eyes nailed to the floor, and Bella fussed around her.

"She won't say a word… I'm worried about her." Bella's hand shook while she gently caressed the other girl's cheek.

"Is she your best friend?" Jasper asked.

"Yes, she's my best friend. We share everything, everything. She's my one and only Alice."

"I think she has not shared everything with you, Bella."

I witnessed Alice's awakening. She looked at Jasper with huge pleading eyes, then spoke in a tiny voice.

"Please don't tell her, please, sir" she uttered.

Jasper took her hand and kissed her knuckles.

"Don't worry. I won't. You'll tell her, some day. When you're ready."

~"~

We left the two girls stuck in a tight embrace.

I had questions, of course, but waited until we reached the agency.

"Will you invite me in?" I hoped I didn't sound desperate.

"Of course. I need some good company. And some more time with you."

We entered Jasper's office and each took a seat.

"Will you tell me what happened to that Alice girl?" I was damn curious.

"Okay, listen. Did you notice it all happened when she had to present the silk ribbon to Bella? Let's see what this might have triggered. I guess you've never seen a thing like that, but the silk ribbon makes a perfect bondage. For sexual play, I mean. Now, these girls are young, and sex is one of the main things they think about. And in Alice's head, sex is something that goes together with bondage, and with another girl. I assume, one girl in particular."

I blushed. "Are you sure? They are too young to be that kinky."

"There's no such thing as the right age for this realization, Edward."

"So, that's why she knelt?"

"Precisely. That was part of her fantasy becoming real."

"How did you know that?"

"I saw it in her eyes. I've seen this many times."

"You have?"

"Yes. With my partners."

"With your… Ah…Uhm. Well. I see."

"No, you don't see anything, Edward." Jasper was laughing. "It's only if you like it that way. We can have plain vanilla sex. It's up to you."

Good Lord, almighty. Good Lord. It was up to me… I choked.

**A/N: I have a question. Did you see a pattern in the chapter titles? **

**If yes, you'd know why there's only one more left.**


	4. Chapter 4

Hello my dear friends! This is the last chapter of the detective story. As you might have guessed, after the apple, the tulip, and the ribbon, this one will be about a chessboard. All the titles correspond to the Twilight book covers :) Unfortunately, I don't own the characters. SM does.

Hugs and kisses to my wonderful girls, **Lou** and **Nancy**.

**4\. Detective Hale and the Chessboard**

_It was up to me…_

I sunk in my chair as if it were a boat headed to the bottom of the ocean, a boat mildly shaking and slowly disappearing under warm, gentle waters. Like a dying man, I saw images before my eyes, but they were not images of my past life – they were images of what might come if I chose his way.

_My hands, pinned to the wall in Jasper's firm grip, high above my head. His body, pressed to mine, rendering me immobile, wanting, helpless. His teeth grazing and biting every spot on my neck. His nails scraping my back, my nipples, my stomach. His tongue licking the burning skin. His kisses suffocating me._

"Open your eyes, Edward." He was suddenly standing next to me. "You were gone somewhere, beautiful."

Beautiful… The endearment was my undoing. I was ready; I felt outrageous.

"Yes… yes, I was in a very special place. Look, I want you. In any way possible, hands tied or not."

He looked upon me with a glint in his eye. I realized his craving for me, or maybe it was just my imagination, but then a twitch of his thumb betrayed his impatience. He reminded me of a child standing by a table spread with food and awaiting permission to begin to eat. I wondered when exactly I would become the meal. I wondered how exactly he would devour me.

I jumped to my feet, nervous and excited.

"Talk to me, Jass."

"Like I already said, you have something that belongs to me," he stated unceremoniously. His hand rested on my crotch and sent shivers throughout my body, his eyes never leaving mine. I realized my cock was fully erect and throbbing against his touch.

The display of possession slightly shook my courage. I didn't want to be a toy. In return, I stretched my arm to mirror his act and placed my palm over his bulging groin. I was taken by a new emotion, of warmth and fulfillment. What rested in my palm was brought to life by me, and that was enough to save the moment. I felt tranquil.

In the next tick of the clock, he was one step away, still facing me but retreating to his seat. He sat, stretching himself like a lazy, wild cat.

"I never do this in my office." He flashed his half smile. "I'll take you to my home tonight, if you don't mind."

The invitation made me eager. It also recalled the existence of his wife.

"I don't know, Jass. Aren't we going to disturb Mrs. Hale?"

"Mrs. Hale never sleeps in my bed, if that's what you're asking, Edward."

"You'll have to explain. You know that, don't you?"

"I know, and I will. Speaking of Mrs. Hale, she actually needs a favor from me tonight. It won't take long. We'll go visit a place with her, then we have the whole night in front of us, if that's okay with you."

The predator was delaying the meal.

I nodded.

He picked up his mobile and typed a message. After several moments, a buzz indicated somebody's answer, which Jasper read immediately.

"We're going." He got to his feet in a lithe movement. "Come," he said, and led me out of the room.

~"~

Rosalie was waiting for us in the entrance hall. A genuine smile graced her lips, and she hugged Jasper, then shook my hand.

"Nice to meet you, Edward Cullen."

I had nothing to do but reply.

"Nice to meet you too, Mrs. Hale."

"Ah, leave that. It's Rosalie for you."

"Nice to meet you, Rosalie." I tried to be polite.

"You hate me, don't you?" That sounded more like a statement than a question. The smile was no longer on her lips. Her brows formed a frown, while her eyes observed my expression. I didn't know what to feel about her. "Don't hate me, silly. Jasper is all yours."

I was dumbly staring at her when Jasper pulled my hand and directed me to the exit.

"We'll discuss this later. Come on, Emmett is waiting," he said cryptically.

"Who's Emmett?" I had to ask.

"He's my boyfriend. And we're both having troubles with my dog." It was Rosalie who answered.

On our way, I learned some things which partially calmed my nerves. In Jasper's Audi, we drove to Emmett's place, and they told me that was where Rosalie actually lived most of the time. While she was Jasper's wife, and spent a few nights a month in his home too, it was only to fool the authorities, because she was an immigrant. It was as simple as that. She was healthy, young, and straight, as Jasper described her, and a brilliant detective, but she had illegally arrived in the US to search for her good fortune. She had been a tremendous help to Jasper in several cases, and to return the favor, he married her and legalized her presence.

_Whoa_, I thought, _some gesture_. What exactly she had done for Jasper's investigations I had yet to learn, but it was enough for me to know she was not and had never been his lover.

~"~

"Look at him. Isn't he the sweetest, fluffy thing on the planet?" A huge dog greeted us at the entrance into Emmett's house. Rosalie scratched him behind the ear, and he wagged his tail and rose his paw in a dog-wise 'Hello'. He was a beautiful dog, with his brown fur with a reddish hue, and eyes that looked as intelligent as a human's. "Come on, Jacob, let's go in," Rosalie urged, and he followed us inside the house.

"I'm in here, sweetie," a booming voice came from my left, and Rosalie led us toward a closed door. When she entered, I noticed the room was a kitchen. A normal-sized kitchen, but it looked too narrow for the man stirring something over the stove.

"Ah, I'll be ready in a minute," the huge man said. Rosalie gave him a peck on the cheek.

"You're so sweet, bear," she said. "Hurry up. We'll wait for you in the living room."

While we waited, she grabbed Jacob's collar and brought him out of the room through another door, different from the one we had entered. Then she took a chessboard out of a cabinet and placed it on the table, right in front of Jasper.

"Here, this is the board I've been talking about." Rosalie's voice betrayed annoyance.

Jasper took the game set in his hands and shook it mildly. I heard the figurines inside click. To my dismay, I observed Jasper raising the box to his nose and sniffing at it for several seconds. Then Emmett entered. After we were introduced, the time came to see what the problem consisted of.

Rosalie opened the chess board and let the figurines drop to the table.

"Now, I'll let Jacob in," she stated, and went to the door where the dog had been taken. While she walked there and back with the dog, Emmett lined up the pawns over the chessboard.

The dog rushed toward the table, jumped over it, and acted as if he wanted to shatter the wooden board. He knocked at it with his paw, spreading figurines all over the table and the floor.

"Just like I thought," Jasper spoke. "I have to fetch something from the car."

He went out of the room and returned several minutes later with a cardboard box.

We all watched in silence as Jasper took a set of paper pieces out of the box. They looked like Post-it notes, but I knew they were something different. He picked the Queen from the table and rubbed one of the little paper pieces over it. Then he produced a spray bottle from the cardboard box, and used it over the little piece. Another spray bottle came out of the box, and he repeated his actions.

Then he waved the little paper piece in front of our noses.

"See? Red and brown spots! That's marijuana!"

The three of us simply blinked and gaped. It was good to see it wasn't only me who didn't get a thing.

"Emmett, where did you get this chessboard?" Jasper went on.

"It's from my granddad…" the huge man uttered in a small voice.

"Did your granddad have eyesight issues, Emmett?"

He nodded. "He was blind. How did you –"

Jasper spoke again and interrupted him, but this time the question was directed at Rosalie.

"Could this be a police dog, Rose?" He was pointing at Jacob, who was now chewing on the Queen. "Leave that, boy, they're going to use the game again!" Jasper took the figurine and rubbed it with his thumb. "Was he a police dog, Rose?"

"Well yes, he is, I guess." Rosalie answered. "A retired officer gave him to me. Maybe the dog was once in the force, too. He's not young, maybe he's a retired officer, too. I'll have to ask."

"I can't believe you haven't drawn the conclusion yourself, Rose. Did you even sniff at the chessboard, for God's sake? That's the first thing to do if a dog ruins your game every time, like Jacob did! This thing stinks of weed." Jasper shook his index finger mockingly. "Bad girl. Here I thought you were the brilliant one."

~"~

"Will you stop the rant and explain?" That was me. I needed answers, and I received them.

Jacob had been ruining every chess game Rosalie and Emmett tried to play. He overturned the board and spilled the figurines every time he was present in the room. The idea that the dog hated the smell of the chessboard came to Jasper's mind right after he heard about the problem. Then he came up with the idea that the dog had been trained to detect the specific smell, and thus drew the conclusion we were dealing with a police dog. He thought of drugs, and came prepared with several means to exam substances, all stored in the trunk of his car. But he didn't need them. He smelled the weed. The instant portable test for marijuana residue only proved him right.

As for Emmett's granddad's blindness, Jasper connected the dots, knowing years ago, marijuana was illegally used as a way to relieve glaucoma. People used to hide their stuff in unusual places, so why not the game box? He refused to believe Emmett's grandpa had been a criminal, so a disease was the only reasonable explanation for a decent man to own drugs.

Jasper instructed Rosalie to clean the board and figurines with alcohol wipes.

It sounded so simple.

I was in awe. I knew I would never reach the levels on which his brain worked.

I slowly realized I was preparing myself to become a pawn in his expert hands.

~"~

The night came.

We were in Jasper's bedroom, all cleaned up, after each of us took a shower in his immaculate bathroom.

"You know what?" I spoke. "I adore you."

And I meant it.

He smiled and brushed a finger over my lips.

"No, my boy. I think _you_ are adorable." He was whispering.

I felt an urge to move things forward.

"Let's stop talking, Jass. I'm here to see what you want to do with me."

"Don't try to command me." He was now speaking louder. I shivered. "I'll have my way with you later, but there's something I've been dreaming about since the first moment I saw you."

He stretched his arm and removed the towel covering the lower part of my body. My cock pointed at him.

Then he fell to his knees and looked straight into my eyes. I felt the featherlike touch of his fingers over my balls. His lips grazed the tip of my cock, which was moving in front of his face. I realized he was ready to capture it in his gorgeous mouth, and I couldn't help but bury my fingers in his hair.

"Yes!" I hissed.

"Do you want me to eat and swallow you, beautiful?" He was teasing me.

"Yes, please. Yes."

Through my clouded brain, his voice sounded like music.

"And I will. Relax now. Before I tie you to that bed, I'm at your service."

**THE END**

** A/N **Well, that was it. Thoughts?

**A/N #2** I've always wanted to write this somewhere: if you want to see me on FB, there's my little group there, named Twislash Fanart by Dorchester. My manips are there, as well as some illustrations to other author's amazing stories.


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